Book Review: Not Quite A Lady by Loretta Chase

I’m a big fan of Loretta Chase. Her Regency-era romances are classy and sharp — and always with a dollop of delicious wit. With smooth, elegant prose, Chase has fleshed out some of the most entertaining characters in the romance field. Her Lord of Scoundrels is often considered a classic of the genre, and rightfully so. In everything I’ve read by Chase, she’s breathed refreshing life into the boy-meets-girl/boy-and-girl-thwarted-by-douchebag/boy-and-girl-achieve-happily-ever-after of the Almighty Romance Novel.

Until 2007’s Not Quite A Lady

One of the biggest beefs most romance readers have with the great majority of romance novels is the utter implausibility inherent in their stories. For instance, would Cherokee warrior Running Possum really allow some blond nymphet into his tepee for all eternity? Or: would Prince Thorne really start wooing the Cockney wench with the bratty three-year-old kid? Or: would Denver socialite Madrigal VonLocke really knock bedposts with an unshaven, unwashed, though hung-like-a-yak cowboy? You catch where my pheromones are going on this one.

But Not Quite A Lady has an outrageous plot that eclipses any of the ones I’ve mentioned above. Without spoiling it, I’ll tell you this: it involves a baby, an adoption, and a reunion that puts any Meredith Baxter-Birney TV movie to shame. It doesn’t help that it’s all ridiculously predictable. Just a few chapters in, I already sensed where this might lead, but being a Chaseaholic, I refused to believe it would get to that point. But, alas, it does get to that point, and the ride there isn’t much fun either.

Which is sad, because I really, really wanted to fall in love with Lady Charlotte (the “not quite a” of the book’s title). I immensely enjoyed the fact that she was not a prim, proper Englishwoman, pure as the driven blow — I mean, snow. I liked that she had something of a past, had majorly fucked up when she was young and foolish, had skeletons in her finely-appointed cherry-wood wardrobe. This made her real, and I like real. I had so many hopes for Lady Charlotte, but from the moment early-on when she compared herself to a pig, actually longing to be the pig, I knew we would soon part ways.

Also, this heroine is the biggest clutz in modern literature. Lady Charlotte falls down, twists her ankle, loses her footing, and spends so much time flat on her fine patrician face that I was shocked in scenes where homegirl could walk into a room and not bail into the tea service. Not only does this take away the romantical image of graceful noblechick, but it’s also a cheap storytelling ploy far beneath Chase’s talents: heroine falls down a lot, hero is conveniently close by, he catches her/she falls into him, end of story. Her clumsiness also made wildly impossible the love scene where Darius takes Charlotte on a desk. C’mon, Charlotte couldn’t balance on a desk like that! As soon as her ankles were behind her ears, she would’ve plummeted to the floor. I’m not just snarky, I’m also trampy, and I know full well how shenanigans like this play out.

Then there’s the hero, who I also really, really wanted to fall in love with. Darius Carsington is a strange hybrid of geek/rake. This intrigued me, and I had high hopes for him. He was a nerd, sure, but he was also a big-time lustbucket. Darius knows how to put down the almanac and pick up the chambermaid. There are several well done moments in which we see him scrutinizing the internal battle of logic versus falling in love, but even these interesting vignettes are overshadowed by the complete impossibility of the story at hand.

Not Quite A Lady’s one redeeming feature is actually quite surprising: the villain. In many books, in particular romances, the villains are mega-asshats that are evil to the core, without even one humane character trait. But the one we are lead to believe is the villainous tyrant in this book is not a villain at all. He’s a human being, and this is wonderfully refreshing. To take someone who has plans and ideas and hopes and dreams that differ from those of the rest of the characters, and to not portray him as a hateful bastard bent on destroying the Happily Ever After — this was classy indeed. 

Despite Not Quite A Lady, I still love Loretta Chase. Her latest, Her Scandalous Ways, is on my to-be-read list, and rumor has it that this newest offering is classic Chase. So I’ll accept Not Quite as a little stumble; though, of course, the queen of the little stumble will always be Lady Charlotte.  Grade: C-

 

Title  Not Quite A Lady

Author  Loretta Chase

Publisher  Avon

Year Published  2007

ISBN  0061231231

Snarkbytes  Loretta Chase blogs about romance with six other dynamic divas of the genre at the magnificently-titled Word Wenches.

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      WHAT IS A SNARK?




      The Snark is a creature created by Lewis Carroll in his poem "The Hunting of the Snark". To give a proper description of Snarks, one must look no further than Carroll himself, who summed them up in one word: Unimaginable.

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