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About booksnark.net
About the BS
The Book Snark (often referred to as the BS) is a voracious reader. Ever since forcing his dear Mother Snark to read him “Morris Goes to School” for 812 consecutive bedtimes, he has been in love with the written word. The BS will read just about anything; his tastes are varied, wide-ranging and, oftentimes, inexplicable. Though ingrained with a natural sense of snarkage, the BS tries his damndest to be fair and objective in his book reviews. He usually fails. Miserably.
The BS lives on a remote island in a small thatched hut with his snarkpanion and two snarkitties. He spends most of his time buried beneath a pile of books, emerging only to write this website and eat generic canned black olives. Occasionally he can be seen driving around in his AMC Pacer and laughing hysterically at people with bad hair.
(The Snark in His Pacer, a.k.a. The Snarkmobile)
In the spirit of this getting-to-know-you thing, the BS will regale you with a meme he stumbled upon (Thanks, dansong). The BS enjoys memes, but nowhere as much as he enjoys books.
Hardback or Paperback: Both are nice. Paperbacks are easier to handle, but if I think I will like a book and it will take a priority spot in my library, I’ll go with hardback.
Highlight or Underline: Underline, simply because you can also make notes in the margins while you’ve still got the pen in hand. Highlighters are too chunky and unmanageable.
Lewis or Tolkien: Lewis has always made more sense to me.
E.B. White or A.A. Milne: Milne. The partner and I both had stuffed Winnie-the-Poohs when we were kids…and we still have them.
T.S. Eliot or e.e. cummings: Oh this is tough, but I think cummings slightly edges out over Eliot. cummings was such a visionary — plus, his fuck-convention grammar and punctuation was hot.
Stephen King or Dean Koontz: King is a master storyteller. He’s tough to beat.
Barnes & Noble or Borders: I love all bookstores. Any building that can house that many books without the employees detonating from sheer bliss is a worthy one.
Waldenbooks or B. Dalton: There’s not too many of either ’round here in Snarkland. However, growing up, the only thing we had was a B. Dalton. I may never have had the opportunity to purchase books without good ol’ B.
Fantasy or Science Fiction: Fantasy. I am SciFi-challenged.
Horror or Suspense: Suspense intrigues me more than severed heads and psychotic dolls.
Bookmark or Dogear: Bookmark. Though “dogear” is a fun word.
Large Print or Fine Print: Large Print makes the BS queasy. I once threw up clam chowder on Katharine Hepburn’s “Me”.
Hemingway or Faulkner: Hemingway. Sure, he was a tortured soul with some messed-up views, but when it comes to language, Papa was da BOMB.
Fitzgerald or Steinbeck: Fitzgerald. Many of his scenes have stuck in my noggin with startling clarity.
Homer or Plato: Plato. Just because I always liked Kimberly on “Diff’rent Strokes”.
Geoffrey Chaucer or Edmund Spenser: I haven’t read either. That Olde English stuff maketh the BS wisheth for Deathes dore.
Pen or Pencil: Pen. I don’t trust pencils.
Looseleaf or Notepad: Notepad. Looseleaf is too…loose. I like my paper like I like my men: tight, together and bound.
Alphabetize? By Author or By Title: Author, then by title within each author’s name. The BS has had OCD since an early age.
Shelving? By Genre/Subject or All Books Together: All books together…but you’ve just given me a great idea….
Dustjacket? Leave it On or Take it Off: Leave it on, unless reading in the bath.
Novella or Epic: Epic, though I am of the firm belief that a novella can be just as epic as an Epic.
John Grisham or Scott Turow: The Book Snark doesn’t go there.
J.K. Rowling or Lemony Snicket: I have to say Rowling, only because my snarkpanion will maim me if I don’t.
John Irving or John Updike: Oh my, this is entirely too difficult. Can I have both?
Salman Rushdie or Don Delillo: Though both are brave, talented writers, neither has appealed to me greatly.
Jane Austen or Charlotte Bronte: Austen, I suppose, only because I’m more familiar with her.
Dorothy L. Sayers or Agatha Christie: Christie. Miss Marple is the sexiest frump in fiction.
George Eliot or Edith Wharton: Eliot has always been far more psychologically fascinating for me.
Toni Morrison or Alice Walker: Love. Them. Both. Madly. Both geniuses and wildly inspiring. Their words excite me.
Fiction or Non-fiction: It’s all the same to me.
Historical Biography or Historical Romance: The BS has a secret soft spot for historical romance. Bring on the man-titty!
Reading Pace? A Few Pages per Sitting or Finish at Least a Chapter: I usually read 50-75 pages a day.
Short Story or Creative Non-fiction Essay: Creative non-fiction essay. The essay is an often overlooked art form, but I love it. Good essays make me do the infamous Happy Snark Dance.
Blah Blah Blah or Yada Yada Yada: Blah Blah Blah.
“It was a dark and stormy night…” or “Once upon a time…”: “It was a dark and stormy night…” The story of my life in seven words.
Books? Buy or Borrow: If I think I will like the book, and it’s not fresh-off-the-press, then I’ll buy it. If it’s brand new, or I’m unsure how I’ll respond to it, I’ll borrow it. Plus, there is something so intoxicating about libraries. All those books. That smell. That erotically-charged bun on the librarian’s head. Whew, I need a cold drink.
About the Site
booksnark.net is a website dedicated to book news, reviews, articles and commentary about the literary world. It was launched in August 2008 with big dreams, low expectations and no money. The BS speaks his mind quite freely, and he does not censor his words, thoughts, or ideas on these pages. This is a place intended to reflect a passion for books of all kinds - a passion laced with an undeniable sense of snarkage - and (hopefully) a little intelligence.
Read at your own risk. The BS accepts no responsibility for a reader’s sudden mutation into a Snark.
Legalsnark
booksnark.net contains items of opinion, speculation and fact. I make no claims that the drivel I write on these pages is true; this site is for entertainment - and enlightenment - purposes only.
When I publish a post that contains information gathered from another source, I always name that source at the bottom of the post and typically link to it.
All images that appear on booksnark.net are believed to be in the public domain and are widely available on the internet. I credit the source of each image within a post at the close of that entry.
If I have unknowingly infringed on your copyright, please let me know ASAP, and I will remove the questionable material immediately.
And please don’t sue me. Unless Judge Judy is involved. I love her.
Photo sources for this page: AMC Pacer, The Snark, Judge Judy
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WHAT IS A SNARK?
The Snark is a creature created by Lewis Carroll in his poem "The Hunting of the Snark". To give a proper description of Snarks, one must look no further than Carroll himself, who summed them up in one word: Unimaginable.
But this much we do know: some have feathers, some have whiskers. Snarks sleep a lot, yet they are an ambitious lot -- with very little sense of humor. They love bathing-machines and tend to bring them wherever they go; they are also handy for striking a light. Snarks live on a far-off island, a place filled with chasms and crags, and are constantly on the lookout for Snark-hunters. Their mortal enemies are hope, care, thimbles and forks.
The Book Snark's Pick for Best Book of 2008
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